Author Topic: 12 Hidden Keys  (Read 6588 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Online Brandonazz

  • Baseball SuperStar
  • *****
  • Posts: 8885
  • Hoc etiam transibit
    • View Profile
    • My Internet Treasure Trove
12 Hidden Keys
« on: September 08, 2010, 09:17:35 pm »
From the ancient scrolls of Krakow Sam:

I. Many years ago when the forum was young, and there was but ONE true forum theme (and its name was called Babylon), a great evil didst arise in the swirling maelstrom of the Spore General forum.
II. Though none knew from whence it came, or its nature, it threatened to do great injury to the forum, and the people were greatly afeared.
III. and the people didst throw up their arms and didst flail in vain at the 'report to moderator' button, but no moderator could stand against the evil.
IV. and it came to pass that the evil threatened to encroach on all, forever tarnishing the internets like a dark squall.
V. When all seemed at its most desperate, 12 mighty heroes arose, under the leadership of one called Krakow Sam, who was a pretty cool guy.
VI. and all the girls were like 'I saw him first' and the prophet spake "theres plenty of me to go around baby"
VII. anyway, where was I?
VIII. Oh yes, the 12 heroes arose, and didst battle(eth?) long and hard, and drove back the evil until it was once again confined to a single thread, but they could not destroy it.
IX. and so it came to pass that the heroes all forged mystical keys of all hues and artistic styles... also theres one thats just a photo of a real key... but I digress
X. Taking their keys they locked the thread, that the monster may never be released, and scattered their keys across the forums so that a hero whose heart is true and whose loins are almost as fruitful as Krakow Sam's might one day unlock and defeat the great evil.
XI. and that guy would get some sort of certificate, and everyone would get to call him KEYMASTER SUPERIOR, and a tickertape parade be thrown in his honour.
XII. This is the word of Prophetmaster General Krakow Sam. May your days be joyful and your house be visited with FIVE TONS OF FLAX!


It did please the gods of fortune to strike down the ultimate attempts of all who would seek out the magical keys, though. The new council, formed of both those who came after the ancient ones and their surviving predecessors, resolved to once again scatter a mysterious set of keys about the pages of the forum. The great evil was no longer the indomitable threat of the past, and if it should be fair that the forces that be grant the keys to liberate it upon the universe, it would be so. The masters were chosen, and granted the right to forge their keys and scatter them across the forum, leaving clues that only the most worthy would find use in pursuit of.
 
Keymasters of the Second Order: (Forged)

Oviraptor the Egg Dino
Krakow Sam the Polish Cowboy
Patman33 the Sticker
Brandonazz the Gay
Inkling the Suit
Daxx the Polemical
Gec the Lizard
Celdur Something Not Dutch Dammit
LadyM the Belle
Cobra the Snake
Mr. Wizard the Archmage
Gauphastus the Canadian

Quoth the Prophet Sam:

It would be unwise to refuse the position of keymaster, but if you wish to be lifted of responsibility simply post and a replacement keymaster will be found... eventually.

Clues:

Ovirapator: Spanking the monkey is endless fun!

Krakow Sam: In the fourth era the Dark Mother used the Elder Key to open the way for the Elder Race.

Patman33: Really, it's not that big of a deal. It's just posts.

Brandonazz: The key is found where one can see Europe as I once did.

Inkling: It's not under my straw hat, but you're getting warmer.  What day is scarier than Halloween?   :-\

Daxx: Necromancy is best fought with Image Macros and Pulp Fiction references.

Mr. Wizard: Made of a thousand words, no one spoke the magic three.

Celdur: Solving puzzles doesn't have to be hard.

LadyM: Lucy in the sky with diamonds.

Gauphastus: Those are some hot tunes, yo.



If you think you've discovered a key, contact its master that you might know that it is authentic, and not reveal it to others. You will receive public praise upon confirmation! If you reveal it publicly, you will be declared a loser douche bag and shunned forevermore.
« Last Edit: September 13, 2010, 05:33:38 am by Brandonazz »



Offline PatMan33

  • Fable Hero
  • *****
  • Posts: 28788
  • M I RITE? STICKERS?
    • View Profile
    • DuckDuckGo
Re: 12 Hidden Keys
« Reply #1 on: September 08, 2010, 10:04:21 pm »
If you find my key, send me a PM so I can make sure you actually found it and didn't just brute force your way to it.

NO SPOILING KEY LOCATIONS! WHEN YOU FIND IT, IT'S OUR LITTLE SECRET!

Offline eropS

  • Out Run Speedster
  • *****
  • Posts: 5137
  • That's right, I went there
    • View Profile
Re: 12 Hidden Keys
« Reply #2 on: September 08, 2010, 10:08:19 pm »
I don't understand. Is the key an actual key or is it a post that has the related clue?
No, no, he did. In the everything else section, at least. Officially, this makes him king.

Offline PatMan33

  • Fable Hero
  • *****
  • Posts: 28788
  • M I RITE? STICKERS?
    • View Profile
    • DuckDuckGo
Re: 12 Hidden Keys
« Reply #3 on: September 08, 2010, 10:09:02 pm »
It should have the relative shape of a key. That is, a handle and a long, central shaft.

Offline eropS

  • Out Run Speedster
  • *****
  • Posts: 5137
  • That's right, I went there
    • View Profile
Re: 12 Hidden Keys
« Reply #4 on: September 08, 2010, 10:15:16 pm »
Sooooooooo....... Wait...... Is there a picture of a key then? I find it hard to play a game where I lack a grasp as to what I am even doing...
No, no, he did. In the everything else section, at least. Officially, this makes him king.

Offline PatMan33

  • Fable Hero
  • *****
  • Posts: 28788
  • M I RITE? STICKERS?
    • View Profile
    • DuckDuckGo
Re: 12 Hidden Keys
« Reply #5 on: September 08, 2010, 10:16:35 pm »
Well, Brandon and Ovi were able to find my key.

Like I said, you'll know it when you find it. Mostly because I say that you found the key. :P

Offline eropS

  • Out Run Speedster
  • *****
  • Posts: 5137
  • That's right, I went there
    • View Profile
Re: 12 Hidden Keys
« Reply #6 on: September 08, 2010, 10:18:08 pm »
Brandon and Ovi also know how the game works because they helped make it. :P

I am severely confused here. Rys, how do i play?
No, no, he did. In the everything else section, at least. Officially, this makes him king.

Online Brandonazz

  • Baseball SuperStar
  • *****
  • Posts: 8885
  • Hoc etiam transibit
    • View Profile
    • My Internet Treasure Trove
Re: 12 Hidden Keys
« Reply #7 on: September 08, 2010, 10:19:39 pm »
All we had to go on was the clue, eropS. In some post, somewhere, there is something that you will recognize as the key.

Find the post with the clues.

Offline eropS

  • Out Run Speedster
  • *****
  • Posts: 5137
  • That's right, I went there
    • View Profile
Re: 12 Hidden Keys
« Reply #8 on: September 08, 2010, 10:23:15 pm »
Right, I understand that you have the same clue I do. However, you also know what to look for.

Is there like, an example of an older key or something so I can get a grip on this? I'm not usually this stupid but I don't even have an inkling as to what I am to find :\
No, no, he did. In the everything else section, at least. Officially, this makes him king.

Offline Rysworld

  • Autoduel Mechanic
  • *****
  • Posts: 4219
  • hhhhhhhh
    • View Profile
Re: 12 Hidden Keys
« Reply #9 on: September 08, 2010, 10:38:32 pm »
I'm pretty sure I found it, I just PMd Patman.

I have a feeling it's the old one though.

Offline sgore

  • SunDog Pilot
  • *****
  • Posts: 3389
  • Actually, Jeopardy is my second favorite game show
    • View Profile
Re: 12 Hidden Keys
« Reply #10 on: September 08, 2010, 10:42:08 pm »
Daww, I thought I'd get to hide one again.
Ah well. In any case I suppose I should start looking soon.
This should be fun!
What meme is relevant right now? Look, just imagine I'm riffing on that. Updating signatures is exhausting.

Sam:The Ploofy Master

Offline Rysworld

  • Autoduel Mechanic
  • *****
  • Posts: 4219
  • hhhhhhhh
    • View Profile
Re: 12 Hidden Keys
« Reply #11 on: September 08, 2010, 10:45:29 pm »
Me finding it probably proves that finding these keys is entirely too easy.

>.>

Offline Celdur

  • R-Type Force Pod
  • *****
  • Posts: 6615
  • :33
    • View Profile
Re: 12 Hidden Keys
« Reply #12 on: September 09, 2010, 06:27:27 am »
i refuse to be called the flying dutchman, change it at once

Quote from: Krakow sam
That quote is actualy very witty, Celdur. I suggest you use that in your signature.

Offline Krakow Sam

  • Moderator
  • Dungeon Sieger
  • *****
  • Posts: 24485
  • Stern dissaproval
    • View Profile
Re: 12 Hidden Keys
« Reply #13 on: September 09, 2010, 06:58:04 am »
As you wish. >:D
Sam is basically right, he's just cranky.

Online Brandonazz

  • Baseball SuperStar
  • *****
  • Posts: 8885
  • Hoc etiam transibit
    • View Profile
    • My Internet Treasure Trove
Re: 12 Hidden Keys
« Reply #14 on: September 09, 2010, 07:35:05 am »
Even better!

Also, Sam and Wizard have forged and hidden their keys.
« Last Edit: September 09, 2010, 07:40:16 am by Brandonazz »

Offline PatMan33

  • Fable Hero
  • *****
  • Posts: 28788
  • M I RITE? STICKERS?
    • View Profile
    • DuckDuckGo
Re: 12 Hidden Keys
« Reply #15 on: September 09, 2010, 08:45:19 am »
Rysworld has discovered my key! Congrats!

And as per his somewhat condescend comment... the keys have to be discoverable. The first game was impossible and therefore not nearly as fun. Why should I bother making my key impossible to find? If I do that, then I won't get to hear the stories about how people found it. In closing, this is all about me.

Offline Rysworld

  • Autoduel Mechanic
  • *****
  • Posts: 4219
  • hhhhhhhh
    • View Profile
Re: 12 Hidden Keys
« Reply #16 on: September 09, 2010, 10:08:05 am »
Condescending comment?...

I can't even remember what I said now, but I don't think I meant to be condescending...

I do think I said that it was easy? Maybe?

Offline martyk

  • Simon Belmont
  • *****
  • Posts: 5333
  • Never underestimate the power of dolphin!
    • View Profile
Re: 12 Hidden Keys
« Reply #17 on: September 09, 2010, 10:24:52 am »
Pew pew pew!  Found Sam's key!
Quote from: Doctor Zay
Martyk is a handsome fish.
Quote from: Brandonazz
This dolphin is delicious.
Quote
<Sgore> Martyk, mentally I always picture you as like, our forums bartender.
<Neoadept> I've always pictured you trapped in a tuna net

Offline Kratok

  • Turkey Shoot Terminator
  • *****
  • Posts: 3179
  • Probably dead at this point!
    • View Profile
    • [url=http://la-mulana.com/en/][img]http://la-mulana.com/banner/half_banner3.gif[/img][/url]
Re: 12 Hidden Keys
« Reply #18 on: September 09, 2010, 10:26:21 am »
Condescending comment?...

I can't even remember what I said now, but I don't think I meant to be condescending...

I do think I said that it was easy? Maybe?
Me finding it probably proves that finding these keys is entirely too easy.

>.>
This wasn't hard to find either.

Offline martyk

  • Simon Belmont
  • *****
  • Posts: 5333
  • Never underestimate the power of dolphin!
    • View Profile
Re: 12 Hidden Keys
« Reply #19 on: September 09, 2010, 10:30:25 am »
I think I'm on the right track, but I need to do some more finagling around first.

EDIT:

Ah there it is.  Sneaky sneaky.
« Last Edit: September 09, 2010, 10:32:11 am by martyk »
Quote from: Doctor Zay
Martyk is a handsome fish.
Quote from: Brandonazz
This dolphin is delicious.
Quote
<Sgore> Martyk, mentally I always picture you as like, our forums bartender.
<Neoadept> I've always pictured you trapped in a tuna net

Offline munchkin5

  • Punch-Out Champ
  • *****
  • Posts: 3130
  • Gentlemen.
    • View Profile
Re: 12 Hidden Keys
« Reply #20 on: September 09, 2010, 11:19:52 am »
Damn, i suck at cryptic clues, i've got no chance.

Online Brandonazz

  • Baseball SuperStar
  • *****
  • Posts: 8885
  • Hoc etiam transibit
    • View Profile
    • My Internet Treasure Trove
Re: 12 Hidden Keys
« Reply #21 on: September 09, 2010, 01:24:40 pm »
Celdur's key is forged and hidden.

Also, as per his request, his title is now "Something Not Dutch Dammit."

Offline Krakow Sam

  • Moderator
  • Dungeon Sieger
  • *****
  • Posts: 24485
  • Stern dissaproval
    • View Profile
Re: 12 Hidden Keys
« Reply #22 on: September 09, 2010, 04:38:41 pm »
Hey Brandon, not that I'm implying you're an idiot, BUT.

Why isn't Neoadept a keymaster? He is one of the MAIN GUYS. You idiot.

All in favour of adding a 13th keymaster?

Aye!
Sam is basically right, he's just cranky.

Offline Future Neoadept

  • Brain Games Mastermind
  • *
  • Posts: 43
  • Future perfect.
    • View Profile
Re: 12 Hidden Keys
« Reply #23 on: September 09, 2010, 04:42:18 pm »
Nay.
From the far future I fondly fracture the facade of your fanciful and fictitious frivolity. Five pfennigs for this furious and fabulous phantasm who faces not forward. Faith Forfend! Tis Future Feofafept... ffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffuuuu

Offline Krakow Sam

  • Moderator
  • Dungeon Sieger
  • *****
  • Posts: 24485
  • Stern dissaproval
    • View Profile
Re: 12 Hidden Keys
« Reply #24 on: September 09, 2010, 04:43:25 pm »
Pipe down you! Nobody cares about your stupid future knowledge.
Sam is basically right, he's just cranky.

Offline Celdur

  • R-Type Force Pod
  • *****
  • Posts: 6615
  • :33
    • View Profile
Re: 12 Hidden Keys
« Reply #25 on: September 09, 2010, 04:43:57 pm »
aye and shut up future neo, what do you know.

anyway, might wanna add that my key isnt findable right now thanks to an higher power, so dont go thinking you ran into any dead ends or anything until i say its all up and running

Quote from: Krakow sam
That quote is actualy very witty, Celdur. I suggest you use that in your signature.

Offline LadyM

  • Moderator
  • Mortal Kombat Konqueror
  • *****
  • Posts: 11112
  • I'm not confused anymore
    • View Profile
    • LadyMpire
Re: 12 Hidden Keys
« Reply #26 on: September 09, 2010, 04:47:58 pm »
My key is hidden and the details have been sent to Brandon.

Offline Future Neoadept

  • Brain Games Mastermind
  • *
  • Posts: 43
  • Future perfect.
    • View Profile
Re: 12 Hidden Keys
« Reply #27 on: September 09, 2010, 04:48:53 pm »
aye and shut up future neo, what do you know.

know making a key and hiding it was a waste of time because all you simpletons were too dumb to even start looking in the right place for it. Might as well have saved myself the trouble. Not that I'll listen to future me, I never do, even now. My future me is a jerk!

Oh hey LadyM. How are the chickens? Or did that already happen?
From the far future I fondly fracture the facade of your fanciful and fictitious frivolity. Five pfennigs for this furious and fabulous phantasm who faces not forward. Faith Forfend! Tis Future Feofafept... ffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffuuuu

Offline LadyM

  • Moderator
  • Mortal Kombat Konqueror
  • *****
  • Posts: 11112
  • I'm not confused anymore
    • View Profile
    • LadyMpire
Re: 12 Hidden Keys
« Reply #28 on: September 09, 2010, 04:51:32 pm »
It already happened, I don't have them any more. They have new homes.

Offline Future Neoadept

  • Brain Games Mastermind
  • *
  • Posts: 43
  • Future perfect.
    • View Profile
Re: 12 Hidden Keys
« Reply #29 on: September 09, 2010, 04:53:55 pm »
Shame, chickens are going to be real important in about twenty years.

Anyway, back to your silly treasure hunts pasties!
From the far future I fondly fracture the facade of your fanciful and fictitious frivolity. Five pfennigs for this furious and fabulous phantasm who faces not forward. Faith Forfend! Tis Future Feofafept... ffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffuuuu

gec05

  • Guest
Re: 12 Hidden Keys
« Reply #30 on: September 09, 2010, 05:50:17 pm »
I'm really tempted to make something elaborate for mine, and I don't mean the key alone.

Online Brandonazz

  • Baseball SuperStar
  • *****
  • Posts: 8885
  • Hoc etiam transibit
    • View Profile
    • My Internet Treasure Trove
Re: 12 Hidden Keys
« Reply #31 on: September 09, 2010, 06:13:41 pm »
The keys of Oviraptor and LadyM have found their hidden homes.

And if Neo would like to hide a key, I'm sure we can do something. I don't know how it escaped my mind.

Offline Celdur

  • R-Type Force Pod
  • *****
  • Posts: 6615
  • :33
    • View Profile
Re: 12 Hidden Keys
« Reply #32 on: September 09, 2010, 06:32:37 pm »
ok, my key is properly hidden, good luck finding it

Quote from: Krakow sam
That quote is actualy very witty, Celdur. I suggest you use that in your signature.

Offline PatMan33

  • Fable Hero
  • *****
  • Posts: 28788
  • M I RITE? STICKERS?
    • View Profile
    • DuckDuckGo
Re: 12 Hidden Keys
« Reply #33 on: September 09, 2010, 08:01:34 pm »
Marty has found my key.

Offline Cobra

  • Moderator
  • All Your Base Zero Wing
  • *****
  • Posts: 8951
  • People want ducks.
    • View Profile
Re: 12 Hidden Keys
« Reply #34 on: September 09, 2010, 09:09:22 pm »
Damn not having photobucket access at my office I can't actually see the keys until I get home. So for now just assume I have already discovered all your keys because it's possible I already have.

Online Brandonazz

  • Baseball SuperStar
  • *****
  • Posts: 8885
  • Hoc etiam transibit
    • View Profile
    • My Internet Treasure Trove
Re: 12 Hidden Keys
« Reply #35 on: September 10, 2010, 06:24:24 am »
The Inklekey is forged!

EDIT: As is mine!
« Last Edit: September 10, 2010, 11:38:41 am by Brandonazz »

Offline Inkling

  • S.T.U.N. Runner
  • *****
  • Posts: 8060
  • Not a Squid.
    • View Profile
Re: 12 Hidden Keys
« Reply #36 on: September 10, 2010, 12:00:36 pm »
Hooray!

Also, I think I found Celdur's key, but only because of Sam yelling at him in irc.
Probably not a Goat, either.


Offline Krakow Sam

  • Moderator
  • Dungeon Sieger
  • *****
  • Posts: 24485
  • Stern dissaproval
    • View Profile
Re: 12 Hidden Keys
« Reply #37 on: September 10, 2010, 04:25:01 pm »
 ;D
Sam is basically right, he's just cranky.

Offline Oviraptor

  • Moderator
  • R-Type Force Pod
  • *****
  • Posts: 6684
  • tastes just like chicken
    • View Profile
    • Oviraptor's World
Re: 12 Hidden Keys
« Reply #38 on: September 11, 2010, 07:53:09 pm »
Apparently, my key is too hard...

Offline eropS

  • Out Run Speedster
  • *****
  • Posts: 5137
  • That's right, I went there
    • View Profile
Re: 12 Hidden Keys
« Reply #39 on: September 11, 2010, 10:42:04 pm »
Thats not what your mom said.
No, no, he did. In the everything else section, at least. Officially, this makes him king.

Online Brandonazz

  • Baseball SuperStar
  • *****
  • Posts: 8885
  • Hoc etiam transibit
    • View Profile
    • My Internet Treasure Trove
Re: 12 Hidden Keys
« Reply #40 on: September 12, 2010, 09:57:31 pm »
The Canadian has done his deed.

Offline Gauphastus

  • Ice Climber
  • *****
  • Posts: 4126
  • Hey, man.
    • View Profile
    • Gauphastumblr
Re: 12 Hidden Keys
« Reply #41 on: September 12, 2010, 10:14:20 pm »
Yes, and I cleaned it up after so someone else can use it.
Now about that clue..
"Ma all the gods of furious strong be with you as you crunch opposents, and live like a windrammer as you f**k."
       ~Ricky Wangstrom

Offline Krakow Sam

  • Moderator
  • Dungeon Sieger
  • *****
  • Posts: 24485
  • Stern dissaproval
    • View Profile
Re: 12 Hidden Keys
« Reply #42 on: December 16, 2010, 02:25:07 pm »
So has everyone collected all 12 yet?

If not, why not?
Sam is basically right, he's just cranky.

Offline Grazony

  • Simon Belmont
  • *****
  • Posts: 5333
  • I am not spying on you.
    • View Profile
Re: 12 Hidden Keys
« Reply #43 on: December 16, 2010, 03:23:26 pm »
Its hard. :U

You'll never know why.
<_< \[ ◕O ◕]/ >_>
Son, I have seen some unbelievable things in my time, but I have never seen a Texan with a robotic chainsaw fist kill a gun-slinging dinosaur by punching it in the head. ~The Soldier

Online Brandonazz

  • Baseball SuperStar
  • *****
  • Posts: 8885
  • Hoc etiam transibit
    • View Profile
    • My Internet Treasure Trove
Re: 12 Hidden Keys
« Reply #44 on: December 16, 2010, 03:30:12 pm »
That's what she said!

Offline PatMan33

  • Fable Hero
  • *****
  • Posts: 28788
  • M I RITE? STICKERS?
    • View Profile
    • DuckDuckGo
Re: 12 Hidden Keys
« Reply #45 on: December 16, 2010, 04:16:07 pm »
That's what I said!

Offline Inkling

  • S.T.U.N. Runner
  • *****
  • Posts: 8060
  • Not a Squid.
    • View Profile
Re: 12 Hidden Keys
« Reply #46 on: December 16, 2010, 08:42:12 pm »
I don't remember anyone finding my key yet.
Probably not a Goat, either.


Offline Didero

  • Turkey Shoot Terminator
  • *****
  • Posts: 3196
    • View Profile
Re: 12 Hidden Keys
« Reply #47 on: December 17, 2010, 10:18:48 am »
That's what she said!
How would you know? :P