Author Topic: SAVAGED BY BEASTS  (Read 3882 times)

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Offline Veraal

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SAVAGED BY BEASTS
« on: September 16, 2009, 05:41:22 pm »

Ahh, you breathe in the delightful air of nature. Your name is Eirik Vold, you grew up in the frozen northlands and moved to the south to live a warmer, more comfortable life. You're a stout, strong and capable man who could probably take on several wolves and live to tell of it.

You've come to a clearing. To the south is a way to unknown lands and to the east is a river, to the north there are many berry-bushes that are quite delicious.

^clearing^

^south^

^east^

Being a stallion of a man, you build yourself a shelter and construct a small farm in two days. You can now eat anytime you want, being so cool and tough.


Well, you could do whatever you want at this point. You could just give maximum care about making a nice little house and have a nice little farm and instead go wrestle bears or smash ladies violently in their throats. You have discovered that to the south lies a small town, you could perhaps hunt animals and sell them for monies, you could pretty much check out the town and see what it offers, mabby you could buy some slaves, some cool armor, guards, who knows.

wat do



Offline Cyst

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Re: SAVAGED BY BEASTS
« Reply #1 on: September 16, 2009, 05:44:35 pm »
Go south and get that relic thing.
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Offline Grazony

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Re: SAVAGED BY BEASTS
« Reply #2 on: September 16, 2009, 06:02:57 pm »
Do want bagder said!

You'll never know why.
<_< \[ ◕O ◕]/ >_>
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Offline /lurk

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Re: SAVAGED BY BEASTS
« Reply #3 on: September 16, 2009, 06:08:20 pm »
LAY DOWN THOSE SAVAGE BEATS

UHH YEAH

DOWN ON THE DANCEFLOOR




wait "Beasts?"
« Last Edit: September 16, 2009, 06:10:21 pm by /lurk »
Not a winner anymore.

Offline Grazony

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Re: SAVAGED BY BEASTS
« Reply #4 on: September 16, 2009, 06:09:11 pm »
I lul'd. :D

You'll never know why.
<_< \[ ◕O ◕]/ >_>
Son, I have seen some unbelievable things in my time, but I have never seen a Texan with a robotic chainsaw fist kill a gun-slinging dinosaur by punching it in the head. ~The Soldier

Offline Snork

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Re: SAVAGED BY BEASTS
« Reply #5 on: September 16, 2009, 06:13:51 pm »
Oh Veraal! :D

Head into town and buy some slaves!
Preferably female ones
Quote from: Orc Creation Story.
Stop rolling like pigs amongst the faeces and get out of the way of my sunlight, you stupid f***ers.
Jawless women and their fine, fine feet

Offline Cyst

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Re: SAVAGED BY BEASTS
« Reply #6 on: September 16, 2009, 06:19:28 pm »
Oh Veraal! :D

Head into town and buy some slaves!
Preferably female ones
lol. Here is my to-do list for this dude.

1. Get relic thing
2. Go to town
3. Sell relic thing
4. Buy female slaves
5. ??????
6. PROFIT!!!
DEATH TO DAESH! In solidarity with Rojava!
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Oh come now, Lurk.

The internet is a magical place, where linguistic and dialectic possibilities are endless. Why not embrace those variations and see where they lead you.

Offline Doctor Z

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Re: SAVAGED BY BEASTS
« Reply #7 on: September 16, 2009, 06:31:31 pm »
Perform surgery on a female dog.


Translation:Cut a bitch.

Offline Yannick

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Re: SAVAGED BY BEASTS
« Reply #8 on: September 16, 2009, 10:36:58 pm »
GET SAVAGED BY BEASTS

"It's only your virginity, loosen up!"

Offline Veraal

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Re: SAVAGED BY BEASTS
« Reply #9 on: September 17, 2009, 06:47:02 am »
Lol at all comments.

Offline Krakow Sam

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Re: SAVAGED BY BEASTS
« Reply #10 on: September 17, 2009, 07:05:22 am »
Go to the town and start entertaining the local children with a story wherein THEY get to choose what happens to the protagonist, a rugged outdoorsman with a propensity of savaging beasts.
Sam is basically right, he's just cranky.

Offline Veraal

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Re: SAVAGED BY BEASTS
« Reply #11 on: September 17, 2009, 07:29:37 am »
Awww shiiiet, guys.

Anyone know how to make the computers lose their ai? so the units just stand still and don't actually play the game (gather food, explore, hunt, kill)?

I don't think this'll work unless I can figure out how to make everything stand still.

Offline Krakow Sam

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Re: SAVAGED BY BEASTS
« Reply #12 on: September 17, 2009, 07:46:05 am »
Map editor?

Its been freakin years since I played AoE2
Sam is basically right, he's just cranky.

Offline Veraal

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Re: SAVAGED BY BEASTS
« Reply #13 on: September 17, 2009, 08:09:01 am »
Well, i use the map editor to plop down everything, then test it out, right after starting the computer (the town you're headed to) sends his villagers around to do ****.

Offline Snork

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Re: SAVAGED BY BEASTS
« Reply #14 on: September 17, 2009, 08:20:07 am »
Never played AOE2, so no help here.
Have you tried the community boards for the game?
« Last Edit: September 17, 2009, 08:22:05 am by Snork »
Quote from: Orc Creation Story.
Stop rolling like pigs amongst the faeces and get out of the way of my sunlight, you stupid f***ers.
Jawless women and their fine, fine feet