Topic: Personal Problem Discussion Thread

[emmet]

Bowel stuff! Yay!

I now have a third prescription.

[Brandonazz]

[eropS]

Welp, hope it isnt Crohns!

[Yuu]

http://gmwilliams.hubpages.com/hub/Children-of-Overprotective-Parents-Are-Slated-For-Failure

^^^

Story of my life.

I am such a piece of ****, aren't I. I should've just been a miscarriage, save everyone the drama caused by my sin.

[Inkling]

I'm not familiar with this site, but the 8 nearly identical articles it links to at the bottom and the goofy pictures along the site tells me it may be full of crap and is probably selling something.  If you look, there's an article online about how any and every parenting method will ruin your children.  So don't let this get you down.

[eropS]

[citation needed]

I read the profile of the writer and he's not exactly a sociologist or involved in any real research.

[Krakow Sam]

I read an article the other day that says people called Inkling are stinky buttholes who will die alone and are also vastly inferior to the supermen, nay SUPER-GODS who live in the Philippines. 100% legitimate research.

[Yuu]

Thanks for the chuckle, guys.



Though, yeah, I really do feel as if I've never really been raised by my parents to be ready for life. Like when I was a kid and I was supposed to develop my autonomy, my parents stunted me by never letting me help them out. This only got worse as time went on.

And now, whenever I screw up [read: every day], I get blamed for it because I "didn't listen". Well, thanks a lot! Would it have killed you to be more of a parent to your children instead of pampering them?

I swear, if I ever have to raise a kid, I'd constantly throw him to the lions because I DON'T WANT HIM ENDING UP PROBABLY FIRED, HOMELESS, ALONE LIKE ME.

I wish I was raised by other, more responsible and farsighted people. As it stands, I am mere waste, barely tolerated by society, kept alive by a well that would soon dry up, given the illusion of choice when the brain is hopelessly conditioned to follow only failure.

[Haseri]

I don't know how old you are, but if you're still fairly young, you're going to be pretty elastic in regards to adjusting to life beyond parents.

I didn't get out of the house much as a child (more due to laziness and having few friends than parental overbearance), but as soon as I left school and started working, I became a lot more socially adjusted and when I left home for uni, all the house skills are pretty easy (except the washing machine, screw that), and making friends is super easy, as long as you are open to them, or at least not hostile to other people.

You're going to be fine, trust me.

[Didero]

I'm sure I've mentioned this before, but even a few years ago, I was so scared of other people, I couldn't eat if I even had to get a haircut.
And a month ago I started going to a board game club where I didn't know anybody.

Nobody is good at something when they just start out. Give yourself time, take small steps, and don't be too hard on yourself if not everything works out 100%. Before you realise, you've grown more than you thought possible.
But that only works if you accept the fact that you're going to fail some of the time. And that's fine.

[Krakow Sam]

Oh you actually went to that club? My bullying worked! How is it D?

[LadyM]

Thanks for the chuckle, guys.



Though, yeah, I really do feel as if I've never really been raised by my parents to be ready for life. Like when I was a kid and I was supposed to develop my autonomy, my parents stunted me by never letting me help them out. This only got worse as time went on.

And now, whenever I screw up [read: every day], I get blamed for it because I "didn't listen". Well, thanks a lot! Would it have killed you to be more of a parent to your children instead of pampering them?

I swear, if I ever have to raise a kid, I'd constantly throw him to the lions because I DON'T WANT HIM ENDING UP PROBABLY FIRED, HOMELESS, ALONE LIKE ME.

I wish I was raised by other, more responsible and farsighted people. As it stands, I am mere waste, barely tolerated by society, kept alive by a well that would soon dry up, given the illusion of choice when the brain is hopelessly conditioned to follow only failure.

Parents do the best they can. There is no manual, later they will probably feel like they didn't do it right on their own. While parents hold some responsibly we are each responsible for ourselves. It's easy to blame others but the ultimate bottom line is we make our own decisions. Do we get up at 8 am or sleep until noon? We set the alarm. We make choices.

You are not a waste. You have the power to decide how you want to change your life. You have the choices to make and the goals to set. If you continue to think you are a failure then you will become what you think. Change the way you think about yourself. Change your words to "I will be okay" "I will succeed". it does take time and small steps. Each step being important and empowering. If you do fail, then try again, keep trying. Don't give up. Never never give up!!

*hugs* 

[Gec]

Echoing LadyM here, there is no good that will come of sulking over how you were raised. Now you just gotta move forward and do your best to handle yourself as an adult. Just put yourself out there and make experiences for yourself. Take the initiative and make good decisions. Get work, no matter how humiliating or uncomfortable your work environment is, respect comes from how well you did your job as an adult.

Just remember, you have to take initiative. Be bold and make decisions that will enable you to sustain yourself as a responsible adult.

[Kitkat]

So. I have just been tossed into (what appears to be) a bit of a complicated situation.

>So I like this girl.
>She has a boyfriend. Darn.
>She asks a friend of mine if I'm single while blushing. No boyfriend anymore?
>Give her a silly "roses are red" poem
>Runs away.
>Go to Christmas Break for two weeks.
>No way to contact her.
>Express interest in her (I think?) on our return.
>Turns out she has a blog.
>I have a tag in it.
>Friend of mine also looks at blog.
>Finds posts with me tagged in them.
>And her boyfriend.
>WAIT WHAT
>My friend and his girlfriend, concerned for me, lean that she and her boyfriend are (now were?) still together.
>Spend that night almost throwing up from stress
>I confront here (In my wet noodle, poor eye contact, bursting into stress-ridden tears kind of way)
>She says she thought I lost interest in her (I'VE BEEN INTO YOU THIS WHOLE YEAR WOMAN WHAT ARE YOU THINKING
>And also says that they're breaking up.

And here's the problem: My friend says that they think she said that to absolve herself from any confusing moral issues that may have arisen. She also profusely apologized for the whole situation. I expressed that I didn't want any animosity between us, that I still wanted to stay in good standing with her. I took her to the local fencing club that day, as we had planned that week. No awkwardness beyond my and her usual.

WHAT JUST HAPPENED. My friend still is suspicious that she was "just saying" that they broke up to comfort me more or something. But I don't feel like that's the case. I don't even know if her thinking I had lost interest was a viable thing to believe! I think it is, because I'm so distant, untalkative and unproactive with people outside of my core friend group that I could be perceived as completely unattached to ANYTHING. But then, my friend is so sure of his point...

Besides the question of what is happening here, there is also the question of whether to pursue it any further. I'm pretty sure she's no less into me, and I'm scared to death but otherwise I am still into her. However, she's a senior, I'm a junior, and she already knows that she's going to college on the other side of our 10-hour-wide state.

help me internet im scared

[Didero]

Maybe I'm naive, but honesty seems like a good solution. Just ask her if she really broke up and if she did that for you.
Also, don't take advice from strangers on the internet, especially not from people with weird spaceship avatars

Oh you actually went to that club? My bullying worked! How is it D?

Thanks for being one of the people that pushed me to go
It's pretty fun! All kinds of games I've never heard of, but none of them have been prohibitively complicated, and the club's bossman doesn't mind explaining the rules. People seem to kind of like me too, or at least not dislike me. And if I can get myself to not take too long to do my turn, people won't get annoyed with me either!
And I'm not the shy quiet weird dude I was a bit worried I was gonna be, I'm not too afraid to make the occasional joke either.
It's another step forward for me