Topic: Inkling Presents: Adventures of the Third Kind!

[Inkling]

Hey guys!  Let's do a game/story where you give me suggestions for what our main character will do!  It'll be fun!  Also there may be poll sometimes.


Your name is Billy Neary, and after a lot of hard work, you've just moved in to your very own house!  Tired of noisy neighbors downtown, you've moved to a secluded spot in the woods on the outskirts of the suburbs.  It's a small two story house set in the side of a hill, with all the room an awesome bachelor such as yourself could need!

It's somewhere between Friday night and Saturday morning, and the last of your friends have left.  You were hosting a cheesy scary movie marathon on your stupidly large tv.  As dumb as the movies were, you still have thoughts of monsters and serial killers lingering in the back of your mind as you stare up at the ceiling in your bed, in your empty house, out in the woods somewhere, alone.  You laugh at yourself and finally start to drift to sleep, when you wake up again with a start.  There's a faint, strange light outside.  Maybe there was a full moon tonight?  Maybe you were asleep longer than you thought, and it's dawn?  You ignore it and roll over to go back to sleep, only to hear a loud thud of something falling to the floor downstairs.  Something's wrong down there.


What do you do?

[PatMan33]

I think it's time for Billy Neary to get the hell out of his house. He should grab the emergency bag he's got stashed away in the closet, it's filled with the necessities. Then he better run out onto the balcony and jump to the roof so he can climb down to the ground and not have to go downstairs. The car is right out there and the keys are on the dresser.

[eropS]

But he just was partying! He is groggy, possibly drunk, so he loses his balance and falls from the second story window onto an outstretched portion of roof that doubles as shade over his porch, causing him to roll down into the side of the hill!

[Brandonazz]

He needs to grab the most bludgeon-like object his bleary eyes can make out and make his way toward the top of the stairs to listen for anything else.

[Didero]

The solution is pretty simple.
He should go out on his balcony and fire two shotgun blasts into the air.

Problem solved.

[martyk]

It was nothing.  Go back to sleep.

[Krakow Sam]

Your fertile imagination is inspired by the noise and you construct an elaborate "choose your path" style game. You immediately start a thread on your favourite message board.

[Inkling]

Your fight or flight instinct kicks in, and your groggy, alcohol and bad movie soaked brain decides to go with flight.  As quietly as possible, you put your pants back on and stuff your keys in your pocket.  You grab the backpack from last weekend's hiking trip you never unloaded and head to the window to make your daring escape.

But as you open the blinds, you have second thoughts.  Is that strange light brighter than it was before?  And your roof looks very slippery from dew and wet leaves.  If you went that way, you'd probably slide off the roof and break your neck.

As you wake up some more, your brain switches from flight to fight.  This is your house, dammit.  You would get your shotgun and fire off a warning blast or two into the air, but that wouldn't be very good for your ceiling.  Also, you don't have a shotgun.  You make a mental note to go to the gun store in the morning.

You unzip the backpack as quietly as possible and feel around for a weapon.  You find a pocketknife and a large maglite flashlight.  You slip the knife into your pocket, hold the flashlight like a club, and sneak as quietly as possible to the stairs.

You strain your ears as you listen for any other noises downstairs.  Just before you decide it was your imagination and go back to bed, you hear a clunk of something metal falling on the floor, followed by what sounds like scraping on the floor of the kitchen.

[Didero]

It appears we have visitors. Switch on the light and welcome our guest(s) to your home/planet. Show some hospitality!

[Krakow Sam]

ITS CLOBBERIN' TIME! (You're still drunk)

[martyk]

It was nothing.  Go back to sleep.

[emmet]

You figure the best defense is to convince the intruders you're bat**** crazy. Remove all your clothes, smear yourself in faeces, walk towards them in a sumo squat pose, and once you see them, make eye contact and just keep screaming.

[Inkling]

None of this sneaking around in the darkness nonsense, you decide.  Monsters and house invaders like the darkness.  You're gonna go down there and clobber the daylights out of whoever broke into your house.

You turn on the lights over the stairs, charge down, and flail wildly at the light switch for the living room.  Then you jump around the corner into the kitchen, swat the lights on, and let out your best attempt at a drunken angry hobo battle cry to show that you're crazy and mean business.

The door to your fridge is wide open and a mostly empty gallon of milk is in a puddle on the floor.  Wet tracks lead from the milk puddle back in to the living room.  They look like... bird tracks?  Really big bird tracks, with three toes in the front and one in the back.

You kick the door shut and follow the tracks back into the living room, still trying to maintain a battle posture and angry warrior face.  The tracks fade away as they go across the carpet, but they point to the closet door on the other side of the room.  Man, this milk is going to be a pain in the butt to clean up.  Also, something seems out of place in the room, but you haven't figured it out yet.

[Person21]

Ask the giant bird if it thinks anything looks out of place.

[Didero]

Open the closet while humming the Sesame Street theme tune. He'll understand.